Humble Pie: A week of cooking fails

Last week was a total fail in the cooking department. It was, as my college roommates and I liked to say, a big fat piece of humble pie. Just when you think you're getting this whole homemaking thing down... No you're not.  Get out a fork, here's a nice big slice of humble pie. 

Fall is my favorite favorite favorite time of year. Cooler weather, sweaters, boots, and perhaps most importantly... PUMPKIN flavored things! So when I had the bright idea to swap out the banana for pumpkin in my favorite Banana Muffins (from my Food for Thought  post), I was pretty excited. I made the same exact muffins, but substituted canned pumpkin for the bananas and used pumpkin spice instead of cinnamon. I even thought to myself, this is my OWN recipe! How exciting! I'll photograph it and put it on my blog! But when the muffins came out of the oven, this is what I got:

Looks harmless right? Wrong. I have never in my life tasted a worse muffin. Not only did these muffins have a strange unidentifiable taste and companion nasty aftertaste, every few chews there was a distinct gritty texture. Gritty like, is there sand in this muffin? Did I drop this muffin on the beach? Bad. And the worst part... I still powered through and ate one of these muffins (or as much of it as I could choke down) every morning all week. Bleh.

On to fail number two. As if the taste buds hadn't suffered enough, I attempted on Tuesday to make a clean eating chicken and dumplings in the crock pot.  This is how it turned out:

The best part was, I made this for Jonnie to eat for dinner since I had D group that night and would be eating with the girls. Poor guy.  When I got home, I asked him how it was, and he said, "I have no idea what I just ate." That was supposed to be our dinner the following night as well, and needless to say we ate out instead. 

Nothing like some big time flops to keep a girl grounded. Looks like I'm still a domestic diva in training, and that's alright with me. In the meantime, there's always Chick-Fil-A. Who's up for a nice slice of humble pie?

A name for the blog!

I finally decided on a name for the blog!  After much thought about what I really want to say here, I realized that I want to share honest thoughts, successes and failures, projects and explorations, recipes and tips, and just a window into our everyday life.  I’m aspiring to make my home a beautiful place and my marriage a place of comfort and joy.  I’m looking to be fit and healthy and fill our plates with food that is good and good for you.  The desire of my heart is to create a Delightful Dwelling for me and my husband (and one day our children!).

I believe that God has created me as a woman to love beauty and seek to make beautiful the things that are around me.  I believe that God has given me the responsibility to make our house a home - a place of refuge and respite.  Finding a new recipe that is good for the body and the taste buds or repurposing an old piece of furniture are small things that make me come alive, and I want to share those things with you.

We believe that God is our ultimate Dwelling Place.  Psalm 91:9-11 says:

“Because you have made the LORD your dwelling place—
the Most High, who is my refuge—

no evil shall be allowed to befall you,
no plague come near your tent.
For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways.”

We believe that true joy is found in the Lord, and that he is everything we need for a fulfilled life.  Psalm 37:4 says:

“Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desires of your heart.”

We want everything we say and do to be a reflection of the love and grace that God gives to us so freely every day.  As I seek to fulfill God’s calling for my life in creating this humble Delightful Dwelling that we call home, I hope to glorify Him in it all and share His love with you!

Drumroll please.... A Delightful Dwelling! 

Summer Furniture Projects

I LOVE love LOVE the fall.  I love the leaves changing, the weather cooling, the pumpkin-flavored goodies, the CLOTHES! and even the football.  I have my boots lined up in my closet ready to go, sweaters in tow, and scarves waiting.  I even tried to wear a scarf today (it was cool this morning, I swear), but by mid-day with temperatures reaching the upper 80s... it was pretty sweltering.  All that to say, come on fall!!!

I did take advantage of the somewhat less scorching heat by resuming my furniture projects today!  It was really fun at the beginning of the summer, fun enough to push through the sweat and Georgia heat.  But come July in the dirty south... I just can't stand to be outside for more than 5 seconds, much less exerting myself.  Hence a hiatus from furniture projects.

I did manage to do a couple projects at the beginning of the summer that I have not posted, so here they are now!

BEFORE:  This was a chest of drawers that was at my in-laws house.  After I refinished it, we found out it was a part of Jonnie's baby room.  Aww.  It had been painted a couple times since then, and had some knobs mysteriously missing.

AFTER:  This is in our "breakfast nook" type area and houses all of our office supplies.  I wanted to do a fun pop of color, so I went with Behr Arizona (a match for AS Arles).

I even re-lined the drawers with some pretty drawer liner I had laying around.  Then in a sudden bust of creativity, I had the thought to make a pretty matching picture frame with the scraps and a frame I got at the thrift store!

Too bad I didn't realize the frame was 5x7.  Who has 5x7s??  I still haven't put a photo in this frame but it's the thought that counts, right?

Another project that my friend Mallory helped me with this summer was a coffee table for our good friend Laura.

BEFORE:  

Shiny oaky coffe table.

AFTER:

 

Shabby chic coffe table!  This is Behr Outback (A match for AS Versaille).

Super cute in their living room!

So there they are.  I'm currently working on a hutch/china cabinet that took FOREVER to paint today.  Totally exhausted but I think it's going to be really pretty.  Tonight calls for some fro yo for sure!  

Food for Thought

I would say that I have a love-hate relationship with food.  I love eating... but like many people, my food choices can get me into major trouble with the way they make me feel and of course, the weight they make me gain.  I enjoyed the fast metabolism of my teenage years, but as my age increased in my twenties... my metabolism of course did not follow suit and began to fall.  After a family cruise in December of 2010, I hit a number on the scale that I had never seen before, and I finally realized my no-discipline, enjoy food no matter what philosophy was going to have to change.

In 2011, I lost 20 pounds on the Weight Watchers program.  I can't say enough good things about Weight Watchers!  The program taught me HOW to eat well and how to cook well rather than confining me to a strict diet to follow.  It worked so well that after I lost the 15 pounds that was my original goal, after I quit Weight Watchers officially I lost another 5 pounds just from the healthy habits I picked up!  I would absolutely recommend Weight Watchers to anyone looking to get a kick-start in their weight loss goals.

Recently to keep the discipline in my life alive, I tried keeping up with my calories on My Fitness Pal (another great and FREE weight loss tool), but honestly counting calories makes me go into semi-eating disorder mode.  Suddenly it's about beating the strict number on the screen rather than feeding your body what it needs.  I found pleasure in keeping my calories low and hit a mountain of guilt any time I screwed up.  Not a good situation.  I realized that for me, my focus simply needs to be on being HEALTHY - eating food that is good for me and exercising often.

So... since my Weight Watcher days, I noticed that foods such as produce (most of which have no Points Plus values) and things straight from nature are the basis for a healthy diet.  All the processed stuff has so many added chemicals and un-pronouncable ingredients, empty calories, and little nutritional value.  At the store we try to stick to the perimeter of the store, only grabbing produce, meats, dairy, etc.

After a little bit of research this morning, I realized that this philosophy I try to eat by is called "Clean Eating," and I found an awesome website full of  Clean Eating Recipes called "The Gracious Pantry."  I got so excited by the recipes that I tried three of them today!

For Breakfast:  Clean Eating Banana Muffins
I realized that the processed cereal that I eat every morning is loaded with sugar and doesn't keep me full until lunch (or even my mid-morning snack at work!).  I am going to try these muffins this week in the morning with a handful of blueberries!  These muffins turned out so pretty and they are tasty!  I used whole wheat flour instead of whole wheat pastry flour, and I topped them with walnuts.

For Lunch:  Clean Eating Chicken Salad

I made this recipe for lunch today including the clean Ranch dressing from scratch!  It was delectable, especially if you like dill!  I ate it on Kroger whole wheat crackers... totally not "clean" (the ingredient list is a mile long) but hey you gotta start somewhere.

For Snack:  Clean Eating Granola
I accidentally cooked it for a wee bit too long, but it's still really good!  I'm going to mix it with walnuts and almonds and keep it in baggies at my desk at work for a quick, healthy, and protein-packed snack.

It's been a long afternoon in the kitchen and the dishes were piled to the ceiling... but hey it's worth it to have some wholesome food to eat!  And now I have this stuff ready to go for the week ahead for on-the-go meals!

Anyone else practice Clean Eating?  Have any good recipes?  Send them my way!!!

Natalie

Furniture Frenzy!

The last couple of weeks have been pretty hectic with the Geigers!  Road Rules, the summer mission trip for middle school students, came and went like a blur during the second week in June.  When I got back, the next week I went with Jonnie on his business trip to Stone Mountain, which was hilarious because that's where we are both from (so I got to spend some good time with my mom and dad!).  In between, we somehow managed to shoot three weddings for The Guestbox (the wedding video business I work for on the side, check it out) and get a couple of those videos edited.  Whew!

Also somehow in the midst of those couple weeks I thought it would be fun and stress-relieving to add in a couple of furniture projects... not sure about my logic on that one but it was nice to take my mind of some of the busyness (by making myself more busy?).  Nonetheless I have two more furniture projects complete to share that I am just thrilled about!

The first one is an entertainment unit we found on Craigslist for $50.  I forgot to take the before picture before I took the doors off the thing... so picture this with doors:

You can't really see, but the top is pretty scratched up and the little side cabinets are actually CD racks on rollers on the inside.  We were able to remove the racks and the tracks for them and voila!  Extra cabinet space.

I wanted to do a cheery color to go in my living room which has lots of browns in addition to some teal and burnt orange.  I went with Behr "Gulf Winds" which is a match for Annie Sloan "Provence."  Again I used Mallory's technique of adding baking soda to the paint to give it the Annie Sloan Chalk Paint feel.

I've found that the trial size of the Behr paint is enough for one of the projects which is awesome because that is cheap!   The only material cost of these projects now that I've bought paintbrushes, wax, cheesecloth, etc is for the paint (less than $3) and a new sanding block (less than $4), so the total for the project supplies is about $7!  Not too shabby!

Here's how it turned out after painting, sanding, distressing, waxing, and spray painting the knobs in the hammered metal paint:

Cute!  So we bring it inside, set it in our living room and realize... the TV that we want to put on it has to easily weigh several hundred pounds.  The thing is mammoth.  I mean unliftable.  So Jonnie called over our good friend Matt and together they somehow managed to lift the thing onto its new home!

So there she is in the corner, supporting the weight of the heaviest TV on the planet.  If you look closely you can see our antenna to the left (that's right folks, antenna).  I have board games in the skinny cabinets and all of our router stuff in the glass cabinet part (as well as our printer which had no home before now).  I wish I had a before picture of the TV on a coffee table with the mess of wires and madness beneath it.  This is muuuch better!  But I have GOT to do something to cover the plug next to the fireplace!!!  I have been racking my brain to think of something.  A basket?  A treasure chest?  A plant?  A margarita machine?

More pictures to come of the other project!

Furniture Refinishing - Take One!

My friend Mallory is really crafty and inspired me to try my hand at furniture refinishing!  So last weekend I ventured out into the world of Craigslist and stumbled upon a buffet for $25.  When I contacted the seller, she said it was "all wood" and "antique."  Sounds great right?  So Jonnie and I hopped in the truck and headed over to Smyrna to pick up our first Craigslist purchase.  I have to admit we both were a little skeptical and hoping we were not going to be kidnapped, but we did indeed survive our encounter.

This is what it looked like from the Craigslist picture:

When we got there, she had taken out all the drawers for "easy moving."  After inspecting it, we realized it was definitely not real wood... and the back of the thing was a piece of cardboard stapled on.  Although it wasn't what I had in mind, I decided it would be a good "starter piece" and we hauled it to the truck.  It wasn't until then that we discovered... half of the drawers didn't fit into their homes.  Nowww we see why she had them taken out...

Because I am incredibly impatient and couldn't wait for Mallory's help and advice, I went ahead and googled "refinishing furniture" and decided to paint it black, since my dining room table is black.  I went to Home Depot, got all my supplies, sanded the buffet, primed it, painted it, painted it again... and hated it.  Darn my impatience!  Here's what it looked like:

It wasn't SO bad, but it was just boring.  And the imperfections were really obvious.  At this point I had Mallory over to rescue me.  Apparently she had a method of painting that involved no pre-sanding, no priming, little dry time, and awesome results.  Hmm.  Should have waited!  But we decided the black would look cool under the new color (Behr Cathedral - a match for Annie Sloan Aubusson Blue).  So she helped me and it turned out super cute!  Here is the finished product:

So that's it!  I'll post more details about the painting process if it's successful with my next project.  I think it turned out cute and adds a fun pop of color to my black dining room!

Maybe I'll be crafty after all!

I'm back!

After a staggering two year break from blogging (where DOES the time go?!), I got inspired and now I'm baaaack!  I just completed my first DIY home improvement project, and I decided that the blogosphere is in need of just one more person blogging about that type of thing.  I'd also like to share awesome recipes as I discover them as well as musings from our hectic yet ridiculously blessed life.

Jonnie and I have now been married for two and a half years!  Again, where does the time go??  It is really fun to read the last posts on this blog and remember what it was like during that first year of marriage.  I'd love to share on this blog the lessons we've learned and continue to learn as we grow with each other.  But more on that later!

We've since moved out of apartment life and into a rental home!  Still one bathroom... but we mastered the art of sharing in our one bed/one bath apartment the first two years of marriage.  But now we have so much more space, actual ROOMS as opposed to the combination kitchen, dining room, living room, laundry room we previously had.  We used to joke that it was like that place out west where you can stand in one spot and be in 4 states at once.   We are loving our house, and since we decided we just might stay here another couple years, I'm getting into decorating frugally and do-it-yourselfy.  It is laughable that I think I have time for these projects - I am currently a full-time youth director and also doing a part-time video shooting and editing for my unbelievably talented friend and wedding business mogul (that's right).  But I have found that these home improvement projects are really fun, soothing, and something to take my mind off of stresses such as the 42 middle school students I am taking on a 6 day road trip this weekend... more on that later as well.

So here goes nothing... back in the blog world!  Let's keep it up this time.  I'll share pictures of my first project that I just completed soon!

Storage Snafu

Picture this scene: Living room of one bedroom apartment. Two bikes. Set of golf clubs. Box of golf balls. Bag of baseball bats. Bag of tennis rackets. Treadmill. Ok, so I made that last one up, but that would have fit right in to our living-room-fastly-becoming-fitness-arena.

Now, this scene crept upon me slowly. May and June are wildly busy for me with youth mission trips, so I have been out of town a lot in the past month. Before I left, the bikes appeared in our apartment. These bikes were going to be on the porch before I got back from my first trip, or so I was told. But alas, upon my return, not only were there two bikes, but that is when the golf clubs appeared. No big deal, I'm going out of town again in three days, I thought. So I left for the next trip, and when I returned - the small apartment living room/fitness club had been born.

I love that my husband is athletic. I love that no matter what sport he picks up, he dominates. Seriously, I pray that our children get his athletic ability (and my radiant beauty and supreme intelligence of course).

We recently started the process of beginning to look at starting to think about maybe possibly buying a home. It's a ways in the future, but we're starting to look and see what we like, what we don't like, what we need, etc. Must have on the list: plenty of storage. I can't wait until we can live in a place where all of our stuff, including his sports equipment, can live happily ever after in its very own space (maybe even a garage, dream big!). Until then, he has successfully removed everything from the living room, and we can't believe how spacious it now feels. Like a brand new place. The question remains... where in the world did he hide it all? Still a mystery to me, but at least the living room is clear :)

Long time, no blog!

Please accept my most sincere apologies for falling of the blog wagon... I'm pretty sure that starting a fabulous blog and then not writing a on it for five months is the cardinal sin of the blog world... so please, forgive me.

Newlywed life has continued for us to prove to be the roller coaster we were foretold it would be. Lots of adjustment, lots of growing up, lots of need for grace, and lots of laughs.

Here are the top ten things you missed in the busyness of these last few (blogless, my apologies again) months...

1. We joined an eight week couple's Bible study for newlyweds, and it was awesome. It was so good for our marriage to be in the Word together and to make some new friends who can relate to where we are in life. Good times!

2. My mom underwent 6 weeks of radiation with chemotherapy. She is a champion and kicked that cancer where the sun don't shine (quite literally...). After a scan this week, her doctor told her that the cancer is gone and everything is back to normal. Praise God!

3. Jonnie got a new job. It is a more challenging job and a better fit to his outgoing personality, and it is just fifteen minutes down the road from where we live - so it was a great change! Not to mention that his first day on the job was at a conference in Las Vegas... not too shabby! So, he's been learning how to navigate his new world of sales these past couple of months and is doing a great job!

4. I got a "promotion" as well. My job currently consists primarily of directing a program for 5th and 6th grade kids, and beginning in the fall I will be venturing into Junior High world as the new Middle School Director. After a year of working at the church, I still love love love love my job. Couldn't design a more dream job for me than this!

5. I've gotten pretty good at this cooking biz, I'm just sayin. I still burn baked goods... but I swear it's my oven.

6. We had a minor emergency that resulted in a trip to Urgent Care and a couple stitches for Jonnie. We arrived at church one Sunday morning, and upon exiting the truck, Jonnie shut (and locked!) the car door on his hand. Ouch!

7. I went on a mission trip to Honduras with juniors and seniors in high school over Spring Break. Despite my prissy, high maintenance personality, I actually adored the trip and look forward to going back. Only problem... scorpions. A couple of our team members got scorped, forcing me to sleep with one eye open and my hand gripped to the flashlight all night... but besides that, it was awesome.

8. We joined a gym. And we're pretty much in love with it. He's hooked on racquetball and the fact that there is a hot tub in the locker room with a flat screen TV playing non-stop ESPN. I, on the other hand, am newly obsessed with Zumba workout classes. It's an hour of straight up clubbin' dancing that doubles as a cardio workout. Now that's my kind of exercise!

9. I've been freakishly sick a lot lately. Mostly colds (at least two each month), but the latest joy was a vicious stomach bug. Jonnie stayed home from work to take care of me. You know you have a good husband when he puts his conference call on mute so he can sit and rub your back while you hug the toilet. Now that's support.

10. We're going to look at our first house tomorrow. It was built in 1860 and it's tiny and we can't move any time in the near future... but we are beginning to dream. :)

So there's the high speed catch up. I fully intend on keeping up to date from now on... this life's too crazy not to document!

Reflection Time...

So this marriage thing? Not a piece of cake.

Learning how to live together, share our finances, and spend all of our time together has had its ups and downs. We have shared many moments of fun and laughter, and we have certainly had our share of disagreements over these past couple months. I suppose that when you spend twenty three plus years living for yourself, it is not the easiest transition in the world to begin putting another person first.

There is a book called Sacred Marriage that poses the question: "What if God designed marriage to make us holy more than to make us happy?"

In marriage we are harshly confronted with the reality of our own sinfulness. Our tendency to look out only for our own needs is met with the call to love, honor, and cherish our spouse. And I know that for me, that really brings all of my junk to the surface. Marriage has revealed to me how selfish, stubborn, and immature I can really be.

I believe fully that God designed marriage to be a reflection of His love. The commitment, the faithfulness, the laying down of your self for another person - all a beautiful picture of God's love for us. And we are purified to become more like Him when we allow marriage to change us and grow us, when we kick our selfish tendencies to the curb and remember our commitment to love our spouses more than we love ourselves.

Can I just confess how hard that is for me sometimes? I love being right (even when I'm wrong). I love doing my own thing and having my own stuff. I love being in control. But now that I'm married... do I love these things more than I love my husband?

Marriage makes us better. The benefits far outweigh the sacrifice. We are made stronger, as a team and as individuals. As the years go by, the good times and the bad will bring us closer together, and as we seek God in our marriage, we will be closer to Him as well.

He's definitely on the nice list

I wonder if all men are funny about gift giving, or if it's just my husband.

To give him credit, he courageously went where no man should ever go... Christmas shopping with an emotional woman on the Saturday morning before Christmas. My mom was diagnosed with cancer on Friday, and the news was still really fresh. So he, being the great husband he is, volunteered to stand beside me as I cried through the Snuggie aisle at Bed Bath and Beyond.

So, in classic man and woman form... the clash of shopping style ensued. I meandered through the aisles of TJ Maxx, not having anything in particular in mind, but hoping something would just "jump out at me" for someone on our list. As you probably know, this is against everything a man is. This blows their mind. Mom says if I keep taking him shopping with me, he'll end up one of those glazed-over men you find sitting on a bench in the mall. They could have been there for hours. Or days. All you know is that they are miserable and are fantasizing about being at home with a beer in hand watching ESPN. Wow, now THAT'S not stereotyping. But anyway, at one point in my perusing this conversation occurred...

"Natalie there's nothing here, can we leave?"
"I'm not done looking."
"This just isn't the place, we're not going to find anything here. Let's go."
"How do you know? We've only gone down two aisles."
"I just have a feeling. Let's go."

A feeling? About TJ Maxx? You can find some bargain-priced gems in that store, honey. You just don't KNOW.

This also fascinated me: Every time I paused in question over which size, what color, etc. etc. to get of a particular present... cue husband to whip out his cell phone. "Let's just call (insert giftee) and ask them which one they want." To which I (ever so sweetly) rip the phone out of his hand and reply, "You're ridiculous." You see, I believe ever so fervently in the element of surprise for Christmas. Sure, my dad knows that I am going to get him a pair of slippers every single year. Never fails. Default Daddy gift. But do I tell him that's what he's getting? Absolutely not. It's the principle of the thing.

After several hours of following me around... I got progressively more and more stressed and more and more emotional, so he won the Best Husband of the Year Award by volunteering to do the rest of the Christmas shopping himself.

Including... his own presents. Yes. Against all I just reported above.

So last night we decided to go ahead and celebrate our Christmas together before spending the holidays with family. Somehow still as excited as a kid on Christmas morning, he handed me a bag full of stuff that he had bought for his own stocking and raced out to put together my stocking. I opened the bag and guiltily stuffed his stocking with the items, feeling terrible for not choosing them myself, but so grateful he let me go home and spend time with my mom instead. He came back in, still way more excited than necessary, considering the fact that he had no Christmas surprises. As I began revealing gifts from my stocking, I quickly realized that his excitement was stemming not from presents for himself, but from sheer delight in watching me open my stocking and enjoy the gifts he had chosen for me.

This certainly is not the first Christmas I expected, but I certainly couldn't ask for a more supportive and wonderful husband. Even if he will never be invited shopping with me again. :)

Always the bread girl, never the entree...

I think I have a pride issue.

Mom shared with me a Maxine cartoon before Thanksgiving that read "As the Thanksgiving season approaches, remember: All it takes is one undercooked turkey, and you'll be the 'dinner rolls' and 'soda' person for life."

This was in response to my report that for two events in two weeks, I was assigned the duty of providing bread. The job typically assigned to men who are known to have no domestic prowess whatsoever. "Ohhh Bobby wants to know what to bring? Tell him to bring rolls. You really can't mess that up." I mean, run into Publix, grab a bag, heat up, and viola, your job here is done.

Now in the instance of event number one, Thanksgiving at the in-laws, I am one hundred percent certain my mother-in-law meant no malice by this assignment. The kind-hearted woman, knowing we were only a couple weeks married, probably assigned this to me to alleviate any holiday stress. I appreciate that, mom. Really. And in event number two, dinner with my four best friends from college, I'm hoping the salad and bread thing was a luck of the draw and not the result of a hushed conversation... "What can we tell Natalie to bring? Remember all those bland overcooked chicken breasts she made in college? Let's give her bread and salad, just to be on the safe side."

But for whatever reason, I just can't help but listen to the little devil on my shoulder saying, "Rolls? They want rolls? Oh I'll give you rolls."

I've mentioned how much of a Publix fan that I am, and that simply walking into Publix and seeing my friend at the Simple Meals stand gives me a boost of confidence that I am capable of anything in the kitchen. Unstoppable. Sky's the limit. But I've found another thing in my life that puffs up my confidence like no other.

KitchenAid mixer. Ohhh yeah. The king of all kitchen appliances. Best wedding gift ever. That bad boy sits on my counter, just awaiting an opportunity to blend to perfection a culinary masterpiece. You could probably pour dirt and sludge into it's shiny bowl and come out with an award winning dish. Too far? Probably, but the thing is amazing.

So with the confidence of Publix and KitchenAid combined... I made rolls, from scratch, for Thanksgiving. And I have to say, they were darn good. And I may or may not have made a huge deal out of making sure everyone knew that I had made them from scratch... Pride - 1, Humility - 0.

Next up - I am making Garlic Bread with the help of my BFF KitchenAid for my dinner tomorrow night. Hopefully that will be a success... if not, Publix is just around the corner.

Domestic Diva... in training

Table set. Nice placemats out. Napkins - not the paper kind, the cloth variety... with rings. Candles - the candles my mother gave us to light for our first married dinner.

I have to admit, I had a hint of foreknowledge that I was being a tad overzealous. I'd never cooked pork before. But Publix told me it was a "Simple Meal." Easy for you to say, Publix. You've been in the food business for years. Me? I've gotten by on pasta and butter with the occasional (dreadful tasting) chicken breast for the past 5 years.

I've come to love the Publix man who stands behind his little booth, whipping up a sample of this so-called "Simple Meal" to feed you, so you can decide that this food is delicious enough to make on your own. Then you may walk the three steps to his cooler where he has laid out everything you need to prepare this meal. Brilliant, everything you need in one place, at your fingertips. Way too tempting for this lazy girl. Walk around the store collecting groceries for one meal? Nonsense! It's all right here baby.

That's why I attempted this "Pork Roast with Tropical Fruit Sauce." Feeling confident, I gathered my ingredients, checked out, and headed for my unsuspecting kitchen.

Step one: Set table as mentioned above. Step two: Put on cute apron to make this whole cooking thing legit. Step three: Begin following recipe... and this is where it all goes downhill.

Publix tells me to heat a pan over medium-high heat for 3-4 minutes. Easy. In the meantime, season pork with salt and pepper. Done. When 3-4 minutes is up, pour two tablespoons of olive oil into pan, and brown both sides of roast. Catastrophe.

Sounds simple, except for the fact that the oil in the pan immediately burned to smitherines, sending smoke throughout my apartment. I panic, run to the front door, prop it open with a reject wedding present, open the patio door, and frantically attempt to fan the smoke out of the apartment. Smoke is still billowing, so I take the walk of shame, carrying the pan of burnt smoking oil and raw roast out onto the patio, praying no one can see me.

So I skipped the whole "browning step" and went straight to the baking step. The side dishes came together luckily without flames, and the roast made it to its appropriate temperature just in time for husband to walk in the apartment.

I may have had to saw through that roast like I was sawing through a 2x4, but all in all the meal turned out decent. I can't expect to be Happy Housewife or Domestic Diva on day one, so besides almost burning down our apartment complex, I'll label this one a win. But our apartment does still have a stench of burnt dinner.

You're on my half!

Ask my college roommates, if anyone sleeps like a log, it is me. My head hits the pillow and I drift ever so easily into a glorious state of deep, relaxing sleep. (This is also how I received the nickname "banchee" in college... they found out what I was like if woken from my much loved slumber). I love to sprawl out, legs and arms extended, and enjoy the full span of my bed as I snooze.

Enter... husband. On the honeymoon we enjoyed the benefits of a king size bed - plenty of room for both of us to spread out and sleep easy. Yeah... not so much in our quaint little suburban apartment. Night two of squeezing into our queen size bed made for some hilarity last night... conversation began as follows:

"Scoot OVER! You have SO much room over there!"
"Whatever I'm about to fall off over here, YOU scoot over!"

So, we did what any mature, married couple would do. We counted the wooden slats on the headboard and divided it by two.

"There are SIXTEEN slats, one two three four five six seven EIGHT - you are OVER your half!!!"

Now I know you're probably shaking your head in disapproval... aren't they supposed to snuggle all night long? They're newlyweds for goodness sake! Well those of you who are married... oh you know what I'm talking about. Touching is only ok for the first five minutes, and then when it is sleep time... you better get out of my half of the bed.

I have to learn how to sleep more straight, or get husband a nice twin bed to sleep in. :)

Diary of a Newlywed

Rings exchanged, cake cut, bouquet tossed, garter thrown, bubbles blown... seven days in sunny Jamaica... and now tossed back into reality. Except reality is incredibly unreal.

As I sit here on my (ahem... our) sofa, folding laundry (including my husband's underwear?!) next to a massive pile of wedding presents, I can't help but reflect upon the fact that life is now, as I've known it, changed forever. And yes, this change is great. God intended us for marriage. But there is a lot of changing, a lot of compromising, that is necessary for our marital bliss to be, well, blissful.

So here I am, in the blogging world, ready to share my experiences in this new stage of life. Because, let's face it, this is going to be hilarious.